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shall we encourage children to be competitive with their friends?

shall we encourage children to be competitive with their friends

Seeking Opinion Child Behaviour , Health & Wellbeing 4 years ago

2 experts and 3 parents have answered

expert answer
Laura Fobler expert
Laura Fobler Parent-Child Communic. Expert NL
Psychiatry/psychology expert

The competitive drive often comes from a place of insecurity. People want evidence that they are 'better' because they consciously or subconsciously feel inferior compared to others. Games or activities that result in a winner or loser, only stimulate the drive of competition AND the feeling that they are unworthy if they have lost! In the end, children may become dependent on the positive outcome, so that they only feel worthy and confident when they have won. They 'forget' to enjoy the game and only focus on the desired result. Furthermore, they care less and less about the other person's feelings, winning is the only thing. Instead, try to think of games and activities where nobody wins or loses at the expence of the other person, e.g. let your children race the clock when they need to clean their rooms and encourage cooperating instead of racing each other. Also, do not underestimate the effect of competition on sibling rivalry! In short: especially where friends are concerned, no, I would never stimulate competition between them!

2 Reply Share:
Opinion 4 years ago

Absolutely; although I'd argue that most children are competitive by nature, without needing much encouragement to compete with other playmates and boasting about their victories. Ultimately, competition is a primal instinct that we have developed through thousands of years of evolution.

What I find to be much more interesting and challenging (although it may sound obvious to most) is to teach a child that competition is not about winning, not yet at least. Winning is simply the positive outcome of a successful competition.

1 Reply Share:
Opinion 4 years ago
hoberman mother of 3 London, GB

it is probably a good thing but not always easy to manage ( desapointment, envy,..)

0 Reply Share:
Experience 4 years ago
expert answer
Roberto Catanuto expert
Roberto Catanuto Teacher, Club Instructor CH
Education expert

Moderately and never competition alone.

I've found in all my classrooms and laboratories for kids that competition alone is almost never productive. It frequently ignite anxiety.

But if you let small collaborative groups take part in carefully structured contests, the outcomes might be way more satisfying.

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Opinion 4 years ago
soni rosa
soni rosa soni farmer ID

I'm sure cooperative is better. (Let's think about impact of our competition to our world,e.g .destruction/exploation of natural resources, wasting resouces and global crisis.

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Fact 3 years ago

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